Kick Ass Gift Guide 2016: Joe’s Picks
Joe’s got some picks for gifts this year that will improve your life with strong coffee, digital assistants and good brews.
Amazon Echo: We all want to be Tony Stark and have a Jarvis to run our lives (and have our backs when it hits the fan). But let’s face it: You’re broke. And you’re probably not all that smart. That’s cool. Amazon has put the dream within reach.
Echo Dot: Everything I said above, but smaller and with a less-than-awesome speaker. But it has all the functionality of its big sister. And at just $50, you can put one of these puppies in every room. It’s still not Jarvis… But it’s pretty damn cool to ask your robot slave to order a pizza while you’re in the shower.
Death Wish Coffee Company Valhalla Java Single Serve Capsules: The most powerful (Charles Bronson-approved) coffee on the planet. The almighty Zakk Wylde and the unbridled, labia-smashing power of Black Label Society. It’s enough to make your manroot quiver with fear. But worry not! This coffee is basically a hot cup of whoop-ass.
Man Crates Personalized Pint Set Ammo Can: Do you have an action-loving friend who appreciates a cold brew? Of course you do! Well, it’s time to show the son of a gun you care. Man Crates offers some of the coolest “boxes” on the internet, but with a twist. Instead of sending crappy socks in a wussy box, their content comes in a wooden crate. You must pry it open with a crowbar. And there are no instructions.
In this case, these laser-etched, personalized pint glasses come in a genuine ammo canister. And it comes with a decommissioned .50 caliber round bottle opener. They even throw in a couple of sticks of jerky. Beer not included. But he’ll get over it.
Unibroue A Tout Le Monde: Speaking of beer, there are many gimmicks out there. You know which ones I’m talking about. In most cases, these are a letdown. A Tout Le Monde is not in that category.